When you are too cheap to buy a new coffeemaker even though the coffee basket often overflows, spreading coffee grounds and hot water all over your kitchen counter and floor, something like this happens: You see it happening. You grab the machine to move it so that the mess ends up in the sink. It tips and and the entire contents spill all over your arm. You scream (and you might end up throwing the entire machine out the door). That morning you listen to all your coworkers' home remedy suggestions and end up with a keyboard covered in honey as you walk around smelling like white vinegar and various medications. And then you get a new coffeemaker for your 23rd wedding anniversary.
at 1:42 PM